And where she stood she stood tall ...
What a powerful thing it is to be able to say out loud that when falling apart, the reassembly of my pieces will be with more reinforcement than ever before. The power behind this is two-fold. 1. I'm openly admitting to falling apart at times. 2. I'm quite confident in my capability to rebuild in the exact area that has collapsed. And it is in that exact spot that I will again stand tall. Rebuilding is change and in order to be a catalyst of change (which is what I strive to be), I must experience that change first hand. So I say 'Welcome, mess, chaos, and destruction. You have created quite a web of insecurity. Let me work my way through here by accepting the creation to eventually arrive to where I can admire its beauty.'
Stating your insecurities out loud is the first step to overcoming them. You know that, right? It's not easy. I get it. For me it wasn't so much that there was a lack of self confidence, it was more that I simply wanted to avoid the things that challenged me in the areas where I might not have developed. Those are the areas that we don't want to address due to them making us uncomfortable. We'd rather just 'fit in' rather than push through. Instead we must recognize them so that we may not simply just accept them but so that we can eventually learn to celebrate them. These insecurities are quite often the very things that set us apart from those around us. They are what makes us 'different' .. Unique .. They are the exact thing that may have us thinking 'I wish I was more like so and so when it comes to (fill in the blank)' yet deep down we know that these are the gifts that were given to only us by God. He knows what he's doing, folks. He would never make us like anyone else because how then would we develop the original footprint we are put here to leave? So again. Been there. Done that. And have survived to tell about it on the other side. Standing tall in my insecurities has not always come easy. Thank God, right? How else would I have learned such valuable life lessons in this arena? How would I have learned perseverance, strength, self respect, collaboration? The list of life lessons that comes from growing through insecurity goes on and on. We must fail time and time again to truly learn. To take the tools that we need for survival towards the next web we're about to walk through. It's always going to be sticky. Our first reaction is going to be to flail so we can frantically get out of it but I promise you that watching it be woven again to completion from the other side is a beautiful display of our life cycle.